About being lost
Today an interesting reel popped up on Insta in my feed. A woman said that she quit corporate, never wants to go back and she has no idea what to do next but she feels excited. I browsed the comment section. It was full of women who were on the same page with her. Just quit the corporate life and confused about their direction but feeling happy, full of energy again. It made me think: how is that possible? How is it possible to be happy when you don't see the next step in front of you? Is the key a support system, a huge amount of savings or high confidence? Or the combination of all three?
I know my goal, I see it at the top of the mountain but the path there through the valley looks like the worst fog in the deepest forest. I cannot see anything even if I use a microscope. I don't know how to get there.
I am feeling a little sad and down. The first reason is that summer is officially over. It is already cold outside, the sky is grey and the weather is windy with rain. The second reason is that tomorrow my 2-week vacation will be over. During that time I realized a couple of things:
I am a different person when I am not obliged to be a corporate zombie (I had energy and excitement to do my hobbies, I felt moments of happiness & peace, I spoke to people I care about with such enthusiasm and optimism)
I haven't done everything that I planned which caused some anxiety
In my experience, there has never been a more confusing and difficult time to search for a job and chase the dream
I thought I would spend several hours per day applying for jobs. Reality: I sent 0 resumes. Because I am lost. Following my work experience in the same field doesn't allow me a fully remote lifestyle (=nomading in the countries I want). What makes this way of working possible are the skills I don’t have. I have seen dozens of job positions and I came to the conclusion that I will either invent a time machine and obtain a university degree + 25 years of work experience or start something on my own. Except being lost, I am also scared because I have no idea what I should get into (=hence the fog). Will I ever figure it out?
This product/service needs to be in demand. It has to solve people's problems. It has to pay very well. I want to like it at least a little bit. Ideally, with the lowest initial capital possible allowing me to spend time on beautiful beaches for the rest of my life. Oh yeah, I almost forgot – AI won't destroy it so soon. And it would be awesome if it doesn't involve social media.
I got an idea. Right now while I was working on this blog post. But it is nothing unusual though. My brain produces many ideas per day and then the same brain persuades me that they all suck. So I will sleep on it and think about it tomorrow. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that it's the first time that I am writing while I feel down. Usually, I wouldn't do it, no, I would watch Netflix a long time ago. I think I discovered something amazing about writing: I process my thoughts better which somehow puts ideas into motion.
Anyway, I am always wondering, if nowadays people are willing to pay for the most bizarre things in the world, why do I have such trouble coming up with something serious, valuable and a tiny bit enjoyable?